What does life after infant loss and birth trauma look like? Today’s guest shares in this episode what life after miscarriage and trading beauty for ashes means and more.
Dadriaunna Hayes lost her son at 24 weeks gestation due to cervical incompetence and experienced birth trauma. She went into pre-term labor and the hospital she was at did not have a NICU or Labor and Delivery center so she had to be transferred. Once transferred she endured a cerclage, 2 epidurals in 48 hours, allergic reaction to the labor medications, and ultimately birthed her baby boy who died shortly after entering into the world.
In this episode, Dadriaunna takes us back on her journey to motherhood, she shares how she almost lost her life and how her husband advocated for her, and how she created a digital space for millennial moms of color to trade beauty for ashes with God.
Dadriaunna Hayes’ Bio
I am a millennial christian wife, sister, and mother to an Angel Son, originally born in Houston, Texas but currently reside in Atlanta, Georgia. As a micro blogger and influencer I design my life with the principles of faith, love, and wholeness. I am graduate of both Spelman College and Teachers College of Columbia University and a proud member of Delta Sigma Theta Sorority, Incorporated.
Tell me about your journey to motherhood? What obstacles have you overcome?
I was challenged with my life becoming the word of God, when I was faced with one of the most challenging experiences of my journey to motherhood. I surrendered my angel son back to God at 24 weeks gestation, I found myself embodying an identity I never knew existed, an Angel Mom. I went into pre-term labor after experiencing contractions that led to a traumatic medical experience. After becoming aware of my dire status, my current hospital did not have an L&D center nor NICU center, of which they did not make us aware and didn’t volunteer to transfer us. After an angel in the form of a nurse explained we would need to request a transfer, I endured a cerclage , 2 epidurals in 48 hours, and inducing labor medications that I had an anaphylactic reaction to. With minimal knowledge as new parents and despite me begging the nurses to listen to my pain about uncontrollable shakes and my throat closing, I was being denied the courtesy and empathy that any human deserves. Eventually, my husband convinced them to take me off of all medications revealing my new found allergens.
On my personal search for peace and reestablishing my faith I created a digital space, Beauty for Ashes, where millennial Angel Mamas of color could come together and make the ultimate trade. Their ashes for the beauty of God. I believe in transferring faith through my transparency and vulnerability. I hope that the sharing of her story will bring other women and families towards the Beauty that comes from giving your ashes to God.
Any books, tools, resources that have helped you on this journey that you want to share with the audience?
Crushing Book & Companion Journal (T.D.Jakes), Reframe Reproductive Narrative (Myself), Step Up, Step Out, and Shine, The Mourning Moms Support Group, Fertility for Colored Girls Support Group
Become a Sisters in Loss Birth and Bereavement Doula Here
Living Water Doula Services
Book Recommendations and Links Below
You can shop my Amazon Store for the Book Recommendations
You can follow Sisters in Loss on Social
Join the Sisters in Loss Online Community
Sisters in Loss Instagram
Sisters in Loss Facebook
Sisters in Loss Twitter
